There are thousands of single households in Sweden, especially in Stockholm. Marriages and partnerships break up and one faces a life of torturous solitude. There are actually two sides to this situation. On one hand, one can look forward to a life of freedom that has been compromised in a relationship. On the other hand, loneliness is a hunter that strikes when you are most vulnerable. And the pain of having lost someone overcomes the joy of being set free from a relationship that had gone sour. There is no easy choice, no balance between having and not having someone if only to cheat solitude.
During these days, net dating has become a popular tool for meeting people not only to seek new partners but to make new friends. Most datings occur in workplaces, which is a popular ground for meeting future partners. There are also other places where meetings and potential romances happen such as single bars, dance places and cruises. Going alone on any of the cruises guarantees...if you happen to be a good looking girl or gal, a night of fun especially on the dance floor. The rest of what might happen..depends upon your sense of right and wrong, or simply put, your own conscience.
I had to deal with solitude in various ways. There are friends who are always prepared to offer company and such meetings especially on Friday nights are unforgettable. But then when you come home, you know that the silence of the rooms are taunting reminders of solitude. I have been kind of brave to go to cruises alone not because I wanted to meet anyone, but simply to get away from a boring work routine, to relax and to have fun in the dance floor. One time, I happened to have platform shoes that I could not walk properly. So I sat in the nightclub and watched others enjoy themselves. A man took courage to ask me if I wanted to dance and I said, "No, thank you, my shoes are too high!" Then he said: " Can I buy you a drink?" to which I relied: " I already have one". Then he said: " Would you like to join me in my cabin?" And I said straight in his face: "Dream on!"
On another occasion, I ran into a group of entrepreneurs belonging to an old Swedish brotherhood organisation. They were having a boardmeeting but that evening they were all in the nightclub. I was alone, which was evident to dance partner hunters, so one of them approached me if I would like to join them in their table. They were obviously Swedish gentlemen, so I joined them. It was the funniest most memorable evening I ever had. I became the brotherhoods "muse" of the night and we danced until three in the morning. They became good friends after this cruise.
But the best meeting place for new friends that I discovered is the net. I have always been kind of cynical about net dating. I thought that meetings face to face was better, if only to test the chemical reaction between two different people. But since I became a member of a Swedish/Nordic friendship club, I found out that it is actually fun to communicate with people you have not even met in person. And it is not surprising that many find partners through net friendship clubs. The "M" magazine runs a series of successful romances that blossomed from net friendships.
So whats keeping one from breaking away from a heart-tearing solitude? With a little ingenuity, daring and lots of charming personality, the devil in disguise could be vanished. One the other hand, there are also pitfalls in net dating that one has to guard oneself against. There are bluffers and social miscasts waiting for a kill. Be on the guard, as always.#
